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I’m meeting my social worker on Tuesday. I’m hoping she will come to the court case with me instead of my recent ex. I’ll be working through my PTSD workbook, and other things. The only reason why I’ve never received the appropriate support is because of my level of intelligence. I wish I wasn’t born
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CPTSD makes you relive what hurt you in the present moment through emotional flashbacks. You’ll see vivid images in your mind, you’ll feel you are “back there”, sometimes you won’t even be aware of it. All these feelings and emotions rise to the surface: for example, when I came out of being sectioned my recent
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I can’t stop laughing. It’s horrible. If I fall into mania I will not be happy. I’ve seriously messed my life up. Majorly. Why did I choose the wrong men. I didn’t know my brain was going to snap. I don’t want bipolar. I hate you.
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Yeah I did that. My first ex got someone else pregnant whilst living at mine and his friend was nice to me. He’s messaged me since. But only to ask how I am. They all looked out for me: when I was broken. Although when my first long term ex called me just before Xmas,
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I have no choice but to choose platonic relationships. Falling in love with someone can make me seriously unwell, physically and mentally. It’s dangerous. Seriously dangerous hence I don’t want my recent ex to think it was him. I liked him a lot, loved him but wasn’t in love with him. I had to protect
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It’s dangerous to fall in love with CPTSD. I can only have platonic relationships. Relationships where if I like someone, but the feelings aren’t strong enough for a relationship. This is because falling for someone can send me into PTSD attacks, since I was with my old ex Steven. I really loved him, but he
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We’re only on this planet once. That frightens me more than anything else in this world. I like sleep because my life tends to fall apart when I’m awake. I wish I could have the mindset of some doctors. Death doesn’t bother them. Many doctors are sociopaths and psychopaths. They have to be. They can’t
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The rocking is a hard part of PTSD for me. My ex partner made me laugh yesterday. He said “I get blamed for everything as per usual”. I said guess who caused my CPTSD and he replies oh probably me. 😂😂 I couldn’t help but laugh. Stop it. Look, you might be emotional unavailable but
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Automatic Writing is a symptom of CPTSD. This is why I write so much. To be able to write very fast, you have to be traumatised to an extent that you shouldn’t have survived some of the abuse that traumatised you. That’s why in history, the greatest thinkers and poets became who they were and
CPTSD/Disorders of extreme stress not otherwise specified 