CPTSD/Disorders of extreme stress not otherwise specified

I definitely don’t trust the system now, because Steve wanted to bring me down even more.

He has no idea what I’ve faced and what I deal with.

No idea at all. Because he never even wanted to help me.

I bet they called my parents. The same parents that on my childhood social services paperwork states “they don’t care about Natalie”.

Even the council put me down for wanting a home.

I hope an investigation is done. ✔️

Because I’m not spending the rest of my life fighting for my voice to be heard so I can heal from the situations I never wanted to be in since I was a child.

My family lie.

My mums always been jealous of me.

My dad has always wanted to manipulate me.

They’ll bring me down. Make sure I’m left with a BPD label and no support.

Steve took their side.

He’s not a man I can trust. Now he’s changed my CPTSD back to BPD when I asked him not to. Because then I can’t get the help I need and it will get worse over time.

They need to understand the conditions before they throw the labels around.

This is a severe problem with misdiagnosis.

How many times do you have to tell them?

Isn’t it understandable I’m upset? I just finally cracked and shattered like a glass vase hitting a floor.

I know Patrick brought me down, but he has ADHD too but no awareness of it so I’m leave him to figure that out for himself in the future. Plus he’s better off working. I wasn’t looking to bring him down. He brought me down though emotionally. But then how many of my exes friends have been trying to split us up for years? Quite a few.

Yeah, let’s all pick on a an Autistic woman who was abused repeatedly in her life and tried her best to work and focus on creativity. The only harmful behaviour I engaged in since 2018 was gambling. But that’s in the PTSD workbook as a coping mechanism too.

I don’t mind being alone. It’s comfortable. Me and my ex still speak because we are both neurodivergent and I owe him money from a time I didn’t have any and was impulsive because of my CPTSD and ADHD and slowly paying that back. Whether a relationship works out or not, I still owe it back. That’s not going to go away.

Maybe I should received support years ago instead of the system telling me there was nothing wrong with me until my brain collapsed and I have relive all my traumatic events. It will cost me about £500 to print my life history. I’m not a strong person. They don’t see that.

So yes Steve Cargill, I do have CPTSD.

Thanks for the flashbacks again. Appreciated.

Not.

I had to throw my parents under the bus to fight for the help and support I need. I won’t apologise for that.

The family hate me now. It’s not like they loved me in the first place so what difference does it make.

Everyone can pay my benefits in emotional damages and compensation. Thank you.

That’s what happens when you mix work with pleasure. Just saying.