CPTSD/Disorders of extreme stress not otherwise specified

Steve Cargill didn’t want to help me, nor did NHS Highland.

So I have to buy books to help myself.

The experience of being sexually seduced as a child played havoc on my self esteem. I ended up drinking alcohol, becoming promiscuous at a very young age, and experiencing withdrawal.

I was accused by the school of being on drugs when I wasn’t.

I had to go through hell at a very young age.

A lot of it. Especially older men raping me.

That’s why I’m so against the EUPD label, because when your brain changes, there’s no going back from that. You’re numb, rocking in your room, have preoccupied intrusive thoughts of wanting revenge against men who turn your trauma and make you feel like it was your fault. That’s why I’m against Steve Cargill.

How many times do you have to tell the system you need the correct help in life before they refuse to give it to you?

I was denied trauma therapy. He wrote a letter dated 16/12/2025, saying I had no signs of PTSD, despite Raigmore Hospital witnessing it, the ambulance service coming out, despite the distress brief intervention going through everything with me and giving me skills to work on. Do they not think I’ve suffered enough?

What I’m trying to say is, I’m a sexual abuse survivor and I was let down by the system. The system that was always supposed to be there to protect us, took my pain, and left me trapped in an endless battle of self-torture.

They ripped apart at my personality. They allowed me to experience my pain in full force, rising up to the surface through emotional flashbacks, waves of intense fear, distress, they ridiculed me, dismissed me, ignored me, belittled me. Yet I have the evidence it happened to me.

The question is, why would they damage your brain permanently? Because they know I’ll never be able to get back to my former self.

It’s taken me 20 years to come open about my sexual abuse. I’m going to focus on Carl Jung’s theories. Who needs the system when they betrayed you and watched you suffer all those years.

Enough cover ups. Enough is enough. 🤷‍♀️