CPTSD/Disorders of extreme stress not otherwise specified

I don’t mean to expose my parents in written context to the outside world. Although when you have two parents each suffering with their own mental health conditions, you don’t want them to feel regret about what they’ve done to you, but merely find out who was psychologically abusing you so you can reclaim your life and heal through trauma based therapy.

I have yet to find that part out because I love both of my parents except I’m always left there wondering did they ever love me?

Even I am confused why my adult siblings dislike me so much. I wonder if they too have been psychologically abused to hate me.

Considering I’ve never intentionally done any harm to others, but others have harmed me, I’m seen as the narcissistic and selfish one.

After the way the council spoke to me the other day, I felt a bit suspicious. Like they had heard something about me. That probably wasn’t the truth.

How do you fight your corner when you have narcissistic parents?

You can’t. You have to suffer instead.

During a crisis you get confused about the perpetrator. Especially if there has been more than one. Life was more peaceful when the dissociative amnesia blanked that all out.

The police have no idea how much I’m really struggling in my day to day life, neither do the council. Because my wounds have been disguised as strength to the outside world. Except I’m not strong. I’m a book of trauma. A book that no one can read.