CPTSD/Disorders of extreme stress not otherwise specified

The rocking is a hard part of PTSD for me.

My ex partner made me laugh yesterday. He said “I get blamed for everything as per usual”. I said guess who caused my CPTSD and he replies oh probably me. 😂😂 I couldn’t help but laugh. Stop it.

Look, you might be emotional unavailable but I already had CPTSD when I got with you. I knew that. You didn’t cause it. Trust me on that one. You should see the traumatic events I experienced way before you. This is just a crisis. A pretty bad one at that. If I knew I actually had CPTSD at the time in 2018 when I was saying I had CPTSD I would have stayed single. So don’t worry. But in 2018 they were like “Natalie we cannot diagnose you with something that isn’t in the ICD” and I said but I have it though. They called me manipulating, everything under the sun, took my home, tried to convince me to go back to work after I resigned and I wanted to avoid him.

I’ve never been in a relationship where someone genuinely loves me though. I probably will never get to experience that. Before 2018, I always loved 🥰 with a big heart. I wanted one stable relationship. I was known as the kind person. The smiler. I just never had the chance in life to have that. I don’t think it exists to be honest.

Intentional abuse is slightly different.

That one takes you to a whole different spiritual universe.

Wouldn’t recommend.